Saturday, December 23, 2006

Merry/Happy [insert your favored form of celebration here]

Wherein socks? who the hell gives clothes for Christmas? It's all about toys and games. Personally, I'm a big fan of books, but since your idea of acceptable literature is vastly dfferent from mine, perhaps a gift card would be safest. Don't forget the Hickory Farms beef stick. It just isn't the holiday season without a giant tube of summer sausage.

Let's get the sappy schmaltz out of the way. Thanks for all those who stopped by--intentionally or accidently. For those who stopped by more than once I apologize for nothing. Except for that one thing...but I've tried to ignore it and no one has brought it up we're all good...right?

We're in the final countdown here--Finishing off the last couple of presents, need to make gingerbread cookies for Santa, and The Daughter has put in a last minute request for carrots. Seems she's worried the reindeer will be hungry. Yes, she is the cutest thing, ever.

Probably won't be anything--almost said "substantial" but that would have been a first--for a few days so feel free to bother someone else.

Happy holidays
Merry Christmas
Happy Chanuka
Merry Gravmas
Happy Kwanzaa
Hapy Festivus

From an interview with Dan O'Keefe, author of "The Real Festivus" is my favorite response to a question:
Gaithersburg, Md.: Where can I get a good Festivus pole?
Dan O'Keefe: Try the one up Bill O'Reilly's ass.

I'll have to work that into conversations.


Blogger reader_iam said...

Son had the same fear for the reindeers, a couple of years back.

Here's the skinny on what you need to do, though, for some verisimilitude (DH has it down to an art, now). You way over fill your mouth with carrots (and you means YOU: this is a dad or dad-equivalent thing, in my book, sexist or no), chew in coarse and not uniform chunks, and then go outside, inhale deeply from nostrils, and exhale powerfully through the mouth WHILE running and shaking your head from side to side.

After the first time, the neighbors don't ask, or even say anything (except for at holiday parties the FOLLOWING year, when everyone's a little lit and it's time to rib the neighbors).


And a very Merry Christmas to you and yours.

12/23/2006 07:34:00 PM  
Blogger bill said...

That's too good, I'll have to try it.

12/23/2006 09:38:00 PM  

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