Monday, September 15, 2008

Monday Ballet Monday: Men

Wherein yanking the peas and carrots into position

Daniil Simkin

Monologue of Narek (ballet/dancer: Jonathan Jordan)

le corsaire male solo baris erhan turkish ballet

In the ballet school's handbook it specifies that upper division male dancers must wear a dance belt. If, like me, you're wondering just what is a dance belt -- is it like a jockstrap? -- here's the answer:
Dance belts are specialized support garments worn UNDER tights. They are designed to hold your male parts in place, keeping them protected while creating that rounded "bulge" you see in front. Dance belts look similar to jockstraps with one important difference - a single "thong" in back to avoid visible jockstrap lines. They are also tighter - with a no stretch pouch, so nothing can shift around once you've got it on. This helps avoid the embarrassment of a spontaneous erection becoming visible to the audience.

When putting on a dance belt it's important to take the time to get all your parts placed where you want them, as comfortably as possible, because once it's on, nothing is supposed to move until you take it off.

To put one on, pull your dance belt up around your waist or hips, to the height you normally wear your pants. Do not try to cheat by wearing it low, hoping to avoid thong tension. Your penis is supposed to end up facing up towards your belly button, so you can get that process started by letting the dance belt catch it as you pull it on. Next, reach inside the dance belt and pull your scrotum up inside the pouch. Your testicles need to be up and front, well clear of their usual dangling position. Adjust your penis position to face straight up. Then, make sure the pouch isn't riding too far up by pulling the pouch's bottom back down and back. Make sure the thong is firmly seated between your butt cheeks, pulling any looseness towards the rear waistband. Again, don't attempt to cheat by letting the thong float loosely. It's going to end up as far up your crack as possible halfway through class, so you should place it where you want it to go rather than leave its comfort to chance.

At first, you can expect some discomfort wearing a dance belt. However, a properly fitting one will soon stop bothering you and you will come to appreciate your ability to let loose, jumping and leaping around with wild abandon, knowing there won't be that painful bounce when you land.


Blogger XWL said...

So, ballet dude to ballet dude (cheesy) pick-up line:

'Your day job must be with FedEx, cause that's quite a package you got there'

9/15/2008 06:24:00 PM  

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