Film titles that don't have to parodied to sound like disturbing porn

Wherein idea stolen from here

• Three Men and a Baby
• Two Mules for Sister Sara
• Grease
• Jaws
• Hannah and Her Sisters
• The Accidental Tourist
• Alice in Wonderland
• All the President's Men
• Babe
• Babe: Pig in the City
• Beauty and the Beast
• The Bishop's Wife
• The Astronaut's Wife
• A Boy and his Dog
• Broken Lance
• Busy Little Bears
• Calamity Jane
• City Slickers
• Coming Home
• City Slickers
• Constant Gardner
• The Crying Game
• Dirty Dancing
• The Dirty Dozen
• Ed Wood
• Educating Peter
• The Enemy Below
• Fantastic Voyage
• The Farmer's Daughter
• Father and Daughter
• Goldfinger
• Grand Canyon
• Howards End
• In Beaver Valley
• Little Women
• The More the Merrier
• National Velvet
• Naughty Marietta
• North West Mounted Police
• An Officer and a Gentleman
• One Hundred Men and a Girl
• Papa's Delicate Condition
• Scent of a Woman
• Thirty Seconds Over Tokyo
• Three Little Pigs
• Thunderball
• Wallace & Gromit in The Wrong Trousers
• 10 Things I Hate About You
• Above the Rim
• Boys on the Side
• Cabin Boy
• The Cable Guy
• Chain Reaction
• Deep Impact
• Honey, I Blew Up the Kid
• The Last Boy Scout
• Not Without My Daughter
• Operation Dumbo Drop
• South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut
• Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
• Big
• The Squid and the Whale
• Grizzly Man
• Whale Rider
• Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
• Herbie: Fully Loaded
• An Inconvenient Truth
• Live Free or Die Hard
• Mean Girls
• Mr. 3000

and, finally

• Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

Countdown to Reamde

Wherein squeal

Darling Nikki, the librarian

Wherein putting the fun back into reading is fundamental


Prince's Darling Nikki is a great song, only problem is that it isn't exactly kid friendly.

So I've fixed it.

I knew a girl named nikki
I guess u could say was a bibliofiend
I met her in a hotel lobby
Reading a magazine
She said howd u like 2 waste some time
And I could not resist when I saw little nikki read

She took me 2 her library
And I just couldnt believe my eyes
She had so many books
Everything that money could buy
She said sign your name on the dotted line
The lights went on
And nikki started 2 recite

The bookcart started spinning
Or maybe it was my brain
I can't tell u what she read 2 me
But my mind will never be the same
Her oratory will kick your behind
Oh, she'll show u no mercy
But she'll shonuff shonuff show u how 2 read

Woke up the next morning
Nikki wasn't there
I looked all over and all I found
Was a library card on the stairs
It said thank u 4 a funky time
Check me out whenever u want 2 read